Is Boy Mom Nudity Taboo?
I come to strictly pose this question as a mom of boys. I assume you have all viewed the Zoom meeting video clip of a virtual classroom in which a mom walks into her child’s room searching for something and is caught off guard ‘NAKED’ on camera by her son’s teacher. If not, let’s play catch up, please view the following clip https://youtu.be/1eljoqnoWX0 and catch up with this Pucker Up Pink conversation.
When I first viewed the clip, I, as most did, laughed and thought it was comical. I mean, the teacher’s response of “oh my God, who is that back there naked?” was so on point and belly laugh worthy. As I navigated social media and began bouncing through some of the mom groups I’m in, I started to feel a sense of pure and utter annoyance. Not at the mother being naked in her home, during a pandemic, where all our lives had changed and she momentarily forgot that with a virtual classroom, there are eyes all over the space your child is utilizing as their classroom… No, not at her, but at the self-righteous commenters who thought it was disgusting, biblically and morally incorrect, insane, asinine, reckless, morally corrupt, etc. That this woman would have the AUDACITY to be in her birthday suit in front of her son. See, the problem wasn’t that she was caught in a very embarrassing moment on camera, but that she would dare walk around in the home she manages with no clothing on in front of her male child.
If you’re one still searching for a reason for my annoyance, let me make it plain… I am a mom of two boys. Two sons that I have breastfed, bathed, co-slept with…The same two boys that bust into my bedroom or bathroom where I am quite often utilizing the facilities or getting dressed to ask me for any and everything. So I wondered, was I doing something unethical in my household? I mean, I come from a family of women that have always been comfortable in their bodies. My mom, if rushing to get dressed, would fly around the house half clothed and me and my siblings wouldn’t bat an eye. It was normal, and it never bothered me.
So, I sat to have a discussion with my almost teen son about my nakedness in our home. I have always had an open discussion that if my nakedness ever bothered him outside of my bedroom, I would honor his feelings by putting on a robe or some form of clothing in our common areas. But, I wanted to follow-up on that discussion with a targeted question of, “Does my nakedness bother him, period?” My son looked at me kind of confused and responded “Why?… I mean, I walk around naked too. Is something wrong with it?” And just like that, I confirmed for him, there is “NATHAN” wrong with it. We did chat that some households may not be comfortable with our practice of being who you are in your home, so the openess we have for our household is solely for OUR household.
As we continued our discussion, we chatted about other things that he inquired about possibly being different in other households. Over the past year plus, we have started aligning to conscious parenting. So, my sons are allowed to ask questions; they are allowed to say no in response to an ask from me or their dad; they are allowed to have safe space and autonomy over their bodies and rooms in our home. This didn’t come naturally, it’s a daily practice and work to be a better me for them. My parents didn’t practice this, at least not with me. But my youngest sibling grew up with this parenting style and I don’t even believe my parents realized they had transitioned. The rules/stipulations/requirements that were mandated for me and my middle sibling were non-existent for her. Were my parents bad parents when they were raising us? HELL NO. They were recycling the parenting style they had seen and experienced. But, when you know better you do better, right? So that’s what I’m doing. But, back to to this topic.
For ME and MY HOUSE, we shall go forth and be FREE in our NAKEDNESS. For you and yours, it might not be the preferred approach, but we GUCCI over here. What I ask is that you don’t try to demonize me because of what we practice in our home. Other mothers, please don’t belittle and demean this mother for her moment of absent mindedness in being naked in front of her son’s classroom. For me, that’s the only thing she should be embarrassed about.
I selected Pucker Up Pink because for those that have a visceral response to what this mother did, or what I do in my home… guess what you can do. Pucker Up and Kiss our Pink. LOL. But I want to hear from you all. What are some practices you do in your household that you believe some may try to question your parenting, because it doesn’t subscribe to their version of “normal”? Let’s chat about these and look to learn versus ridicule a person because they don’t align to our sense of “normal”.
